A Time To Speak Up

After a hiatus of almost three months, I think the time is ripe to put reflections into words once again.

Keeping silent and refraining from expressing one's thoughts isn't easy, but thousands of Malaysians are effortlessly doing it so every day.

Of the many issues close to my heart, the on-going Sabah state health crisis is particularly outstanding.

It isn't easy watching simple folks receive substandard healthcare while UMNO/BN politicians reap shameless unspeakable wealth from the sufferings of the ones who placed them in power in the first place. Read more!

A Time To Rest

A Time For Everything

To every thing there is a season,and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
A time to be born, and a time to die,
A time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted,
A time to kill and a time to heal,
A time to break down and a time to build up,
A time to weep and a time to laugh,
A time to mourn, and a time to dance,
A time to cast away stones and a time to gather stones together,
A time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
A time to get and a time to lose,
A time to keep and a time to cast away,
A time to rend and a time to sew,
A time to keep silence and a time to speak,
A time to love and a time to hate,
A time of war and a time of peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 Read more!

Too Busy

So much is happening around us.

Yet I'm too busy to write, what more to respond to the sweeping criticisms.

I guess the critics are disappointed, that I refrain from engaging in a brainless verbal spat.

So if you would excuse me now, I have a job to do...

God bless, all of you.




Read more!

Thank You Series: To Mother

My Mother in Heaven,

It has been so long since you left us it’s hard to believe the numbers on the calendar.

I never really got to say thank you, never really got to say sorry. I had so many chances to do so while you were still around but somehow never did so. Like so many others, I never knew what I had till it’s gone forever.

I was never the person you really wished me to be. Yet I know somehow that you loved me unconditionally. Thank you.

You were always worried about Brother’s well being after you’re gone. I hope you’re more comforted right now. I think I’ve finally learnt to be the brother you wanted me to be to him. It was not an easy task and it is still not easy, and I think he’d say the same about me. Nevertheless, I think I can confidently say that I’ve finally learnt to accept him just as he is and love him as heaven’s very special child. Thank you for giving me this brother. Thank you for taking care of him for as long as you could. I will never understand how you did all that from a wheelchair but you did. You are great, greater than the world would ever give one credit for. Thank you for being a great mother.

Thank you for reading me all those timeless Ladybird story books that always seem to end happily ever after. I can go through life without reading music or Shakespeare. I cannot however, fathom what life I might have without those precious Ladybird moments. I would not have appreciated the humor in Shrek if it were not for Puss-in-Boots and Rapunzel and the gullible Gingerbreadman. Even more than that, I would not go on to read Time Magazine, Newsweek and the Readers’ Digest if you had not set an early firm foundation. Thank you for a lifetime of literacy and interest in reading.

I still don't understand why the Big Bad Wolf did not just gobble up Little Red Riding Hood's grandma though.

Thank you for your wonderful cooking. I only had the honor to six years of your culinary skills before you were stricken with a debilitating illness. In that period, I never demonstrated much appreciation and gratitude for all your efforts in the smoky, sooty kitchen with a leaking, rusted zinc roof. I was always griping and demanding for something else, not knowing that I will one day lose forever the faintest aroma of your cooking. Back then, you always reminded me that the children in the African countries go to bed on most nights hungry and thirsty.

I never saw the wisdom in your words back then. I do so now. Your words are ingrained in my mind forever.

Thank you for never and not even once sending me to bed in hunger and thirst. I am earning enough now to buy myself the food I need, yet nothing substitutes the ones you prepare. I am looking forward to the day we can have a great family dinner up in heaven. For that, I thank you beforehand.

My dearest Mother, I do very much wish you were here right now. There is still so much more that I can learn from you. There’s just so much I need to know more about – from daily household chores and mundane errands to social etiquettes and principles of living. More importantly albeit selfishly, I wish you were here right now so I can right all the wrongs I’ve committed in my foolishness and shortsightedness. Some might say that life is only about the here and now, but I know for sure that you are reading this right now. Thank you for taking time to read and hear. You were always the most patient listener of all.

I regret that we never had a proper goodbye. It will be a guilt and a burden that I’ll carry to my own grave. In the meantime, memories of you and us as a young budding family will sustain me till I too breathe my last and hopefully, join you in the sweet by and by.

Thank you for all the wonderful memories. Read more!

Thank You Series: To Father

My dearest father,

Thank you. I know I don't say it often enough or show that I do.

Deep inside however, I am forever grateful to the good Lord for making you my father.

As you might readily concede, it is anything but easy to father someone like me – one so naturally rebellious and yet so much like you.

I'm sorry that I do not see eye-to-eye with you in so many things. You have been right and proven to be correct on so many though not all occasions. Thank you for not pulling the 'I-told-you-so' stunt. Thank you for accepting me, your prodigal son time and time again.

I am what I am today because I had you. Thank you for educating me since young. Thank you for putting me through all those ABCs and 123s sessions from kindergarten and beyond. Thank you for caning me all those times I tried to be a stinking little brat, and thank you for knowing when to stop. I can't remember at what age you stopped employing the whip but I do know it takes great wisdom to know when to spare the rod.

Thank you for putting me through university and for taking care of my feline baby those five years i was away. Her death was a very abrupt and unanticipated departure, but thank you for being there and caring for her while i was speeding back on the highway. Thank you for giving me the chance to cradle her to her last breath.

Thank you for stopping smoking. You never did reveal why you ever quit nicotine but I’m sure it was not easy giving up on a thirty-year-old habit and lifestyle. It took you great willpower to do so but you pulled through very successfully indeed. I am proud to have a father with such great willpower, the same spirit of perseverance that spared you a possible lifetime of poverty back in the villages.

Thank you for permitting me to adopt and keep so many animal friends over the years. I leant to love animals from the National Geographic Specials you used to record in the now kaput VCR. I know fully well that the definition for a ‘pet’ in your dictionary never did include the biting iguana, the common ground skink, hairy caterpillars, venomous centipedes and an overweight toad but hey, you had your share of pet crickets and six oscar fishes. In this life I have many regrets, but sharing my life with animals of all shapes and sizes is not one of them.

Thank you for teaching us how to live a simple life. We’ve learnt early enough that success is not equal to flashy worldly possessions and greatness is not measured by one’s empty boasts. Still, if I had more money, I’d buy you a car better than the current one. Your 20-year-old Proton looks as if it has advanced squamous cell skin cancer and is indeed an ideal candidate for palliative care. Anyway, I’m still saving - we’re still saving. Give us some time, ok?

You are mostly a man of few words and many talents. I’m glad bullshitting was not one of them, lest I ended up like the lying liars so prevalent in the medical fraternity. For that, I thank you.

Thank you for taking care of Brother. If I were to elaborate on this, I’d run into a few pages long, and I’m not sure if you have such patience.

Above all, thank you for taking care of Mother all those years she was ill. Through it all, you’ve demonstrated true love and loyalty and stayed true to your marriage vows. Times were difficult and the circumstances were challenging. I’m proud that we made it through as a family. Your deeds and action spoke much louder than any spoken words. Suffice to say, you rose to the occasion and kept us as a family.

Thank you for everything. Read more!

What now, Malaysia?

I used to joke with my friends back in college that if Najib becomes prime minister today, tomorrow i will buy my air ticket leave Bolehland forever and ever.

Looks like i need to go shopping for travelling bags soon.



What now, Malaysia?

It wasn't entirely unexpected.

There was no way Abdullah Badawi could have clung on to power after the embarassing defeat of the Barisan Nasional at the March 2008 general elections.

He was a beleaguered premier thereafter, and the UMNO warlords were on the prowl for a new power base and a new alpha male who could offer simialr juicy contracts and lucrative tenders.

As early as March 2009, Najib Razak could be prime minister and the deputy anybody's guess.

I used to joke with my friends back in college that if Najib becomes prime minister today, tomorrow i will buy my air ticket leave Bolehland forever and ever.

Looks like i need to go shopping for travelling bags soon.

Will Malaysia ever get a prime minister befitting for a country as beautiful as she is?

Up till Sept 16th 2008, a great number of Malaysians placed their hope foolishly in a lesser of two evils named Anwar Ibrahim.

After one deadline and then another, and plans to convene an emergency parliamentary meeting as well as an audience with the Yang Di-pertuan Agong, there is hardly any talk of an impending change in government anymore.

People say that Malaysia has never been as unstable as now.

I totally disagree.

The political waves are merely noises in the background.

Apart from that, Malaysia has never been more certain and predictable.

The way things are going, Malaysians who love peace and believe in justice and truth are bound to end up in sheer disappointment for the next few years.

Sabah will remain poor and in fact end up poorer than ever before. The wealth gap will increase with the current rate of uninhibited property development in the city. Folks in the districts will be condemned to a lifetime of poverty in their own birthplace. Before long, Sabah will be a mini Musa Hasan dynasty and monopoly. Filipinos will take over the state soon enough.

UMNO will remain in power forever and ever. The likes of Najib 'Bathe-the-keris-with-Chinese-blood' Najib and Ahmad 'Chinese-are-squatters' Ismail will continue to reign in their ketuanan Melayu mentality. Corruption and state-endorsed abuse of power will never cease to exist.

Penang will remain under DAP's leadership for many years to come.

Gerakan will remain in BN simply because they are deficient in guts and balls. The same goes for MCA and MIC.

Our oil reserves will continue to deplete as a result of unchecked leakages in expenditure and corruption. Malaysia's economy will rely on the inflow of foreign currency from the two million or so Malaysians working overseas.

One question remains though, who will Khairy Jamaluddin now try to wed?

Read more!

A Sincere Apology On " Wound Inspection Day Two"

My posting "Wound Inspection Day Two" was never done with the intention to portray a department in a negative light. If the article has resulted in such an erroneous and negative perception of the department concerned, I would like to apologise unreservedly to all my colleagues who have been hurt and affected by the article concerned.

As I have mentioned, I am not sure if the patient's death was avoidable or otherwise but was puzzled by the chain of events as related to me by a fellow colleague who was on call at that time.

I am sincerely sorry for the unintended consequences of my writings and seek no excuse behind any mitigating factors.

I have promptly removed the article concerned with full knowing that any damage inflicted cannot be undone.

Once again, I offer my most humble and heartfelt apologies.





Read more!

Chris Rice: Sometimes Love

Is our world spinning backwards?
What has brought about this change?
Can’t you see that people aren’t the same?

I wish I were dreamin’,
And could wake up from my sleep,
And find us all the way we used to be...

Cause the love that used to be is dying,
Is anybody even trying?
And I don’t know how, I don’t know why.
But somethin’ in my soul is crying,

Sometimes love has to drive a nail into its own hand
Sometimes love has to drive a nail into its own hand

One pair of hands broke some bread and washed some feet,
Opened eyes and soothed an angry sea,
Belong to a man who could see our deepest need,
And showed us love the way it has to be,

Cause He knew the price that love requires,
And He laid down His own desires...
He stretched out His hands to save His friends,
And said "no other love is higher"
(so listen to me now singin’)

Sometimes love has to drive a nail into its own hand
Sometimes love has to drive a nail into its own hand

Love can change us, love can make a way
Only Jesus' love can change us, love can make a way

Sometimes love has to drive a nail into its own hand
Sometimes love has to drive a nail into its own hand Read more!

Selamat Hari Raya from SESB

Selamat Hari Raya from SESB Sdn Bhd

A very Selamat Hari Raya to all Sabahans, and Malaysians in general.

We at Sabah Everyday Sure Blackout (SESB) Sdn. Bhd would like to extend our most sincere greetings and heartfelt wishes on this special occasion.

As you are all aware, SESB is the only power utility company in Sabah, Malaysia.

As such, we are under tremendous pressure and stress at all times to serve the 361,400 customers of Sabah. Sabahans are reminded that we at SESB are also catering to our most numerous and precious clients, the Indopinos who are naturally talented and gifted in making legal illegal electrical connections.

Rest assured that SESB is fully informed that you bono fide SESB customers are constantly billed more than you should be as a result of all these Indopino connections. Please keep your calm and hold your peace. Closing one eye and sometimes both is an inherent national culture. In addition, we at SESB are staunch believers and doers of Islam Hadhari. Therefore, charity to our less wealthy Project IC fellow citizens comes quite naturally. We cordially invite all SESB clients to join us in this noble project to empower the future bumiputeras of Sabah.

We are also in full knowing that electrical cables are frequently missing and displaced uncannily, resulting in regular electrical breakdown to homes, businesses and medical centers. Although the apparent culprits, once again the Indopinos are not uncommonly caught red handed, we urge restraint and patience among all Sabahans. It is an unwritten policy in SESB that Malaysia as an oil-rich nation can spare some steel for our less fortunate fellow human beings especially those that buy Malaysian identification cards for RM 110.

By the way, did you know that electricity started in Sabah as early as 1910? In those dark, gloomy pre-independence days, electricity was supplied by 3 separate organizations. In line with UMNO’s spirit for political monopoly and business hegemony, all distributing rights for power utility has been accorded to us here at SESB. Needless to say, we are proud to be partakers in a system of cronyism and nepotism. Surely we as peace-loving harmonious Malaysians do not desire a competitive business environment?

SESB sincerely apologise that after almost a hundred years, the state of Sabah is still not fully supplied with electricities. Our most honorable chairman Tan Sri Datuk Amar Leo Moggie Anak Irok and most famed deputy chairman Bung Moktar bin Radin are in constant brainstorming in order to rectify this trivial matter. In the meantime, we plead with the kind and gullible folks of Kota Marudu, Pitas, Ranau and Kudat to continue the most enjoyable practice of using petrol-powered generators. The occasional fires and consequent loss of human lives are unfortunate and most regretted.

However, SESB reiterates that we are all responsible for our actions. As a typical UMNO government-linked company, SESB will therefore not be liable for any mishaps or misfortunes that occur directly and indirectly as a result of our temporary but protracted incompetency. As what our most spiritual deputy chairman Bung Mokhtar believes, misfortunes are sometimes the will of God above, as what he strongly believes was what befell Karpal Singh.

At this juncture, we at SESB would also like to clarify that our hotline operators were not immediately available to respond to today’s two-hour long blackout in Kota Kinabalu because they were busy with some anu bah. SESB understands that the Queen Elizabeth Hospital is a frequent victims of such blackouts in Kota Kinabalu.

We have been informed repeatedly by Dr. POTS that the lives of some patients are solely dependent on the availability of continuous electricity. Dr POTS has also written to us complaining that the blackouts in the hospital have resulted in some osteoarthritis and osteoporosis-strickened folks having to walk six floors up to visit their ailing loved ones in the wards.

Now, while the complaints of Dr POTS are duly noted, we once again cite our principle that some unfortunate events are simply God’s will. As such, SESB shall not be held liable either directly or indirectly over the morbidity and mortality suffered by patients of no political or monetary importance.

Should any family members be dissatisfied however, clients are always welcomed to contact our highly-trained hotline operators at 15454.

Maaf zahir dan batin.

Salam.

Your pain in the ass,
SESB Management.

Read more!

Thinking About: Migration (4) / Is There A Future For Malaysia?

Just as Malaysia is a heterogenous nation with many colors and shapes, the states within the republic will not evolve homogenously over the years.



Thinking About: Migration (3) / Is There A Future For Malaysia?

Nobody really knows how many Malaysians have left the country since 1969.

The year 1969 and not 1957 is arbitrarily employed as the starting date because the UMNO-planned May 13 massacre was a profound factor for emigration back then.

In fact ever since the UMNO hooligans went on their bloody rampage that fateful date, Malaysians of all ethnicities go about their daily lives subtly weighing the possibility of another racial slaughter.

Malaysians have lived in paranoia since May 13 1969.

Our parents who lived through May 13 hush us up when we make statements that are deemed anti-government, as opposed to anti-Malaysia. Those born after 1969 and raised in the era of the New Economic Policy (NEP) are indoctrinated from school through university to toe the line and not question the special privileges of the special groups, and I am certainly not referring to mentally-challenged children and physically-handicapped persons. Voters cast their support for candidates from race-based parties in order to maintain status quo out of fear that the opposite means a bloodbath with the UMNO keris.

I imagine being in the shoes of our parents and grandparents right after May 13, 1969. I believe in their minds was one very intense question, the issue of whether there was any hope left for a racially-divided Malaysia after UMNO’s deliberate butchery.

Two Million?

Anyway, no one really knows how many Malaysians have opted to settle elsewhere. The National Registration Department may have records of Malaysians surrendering their citizenships and passports but not records of permanent emigration. We should bear in mind that these adopted lands are never necessarily greener pastures and golden hills beside crystal seas. Uprooting is never easy and inexorably inflict much emotional pain when families are divided and scattered throughout.

Thirty years have lapsed.

Malaysia is still around, having gone through her equal share of ups and downs (although the BN-controlled mainstream media might sing a continuous triumphant tune through it all). The fact that Malaysia is still standing today does not prove that Malaysians who left the country made an erroneous move.

We would do well to remember that Malaysia’s survival since independence was fueled (no pun intended) by none other than her vast crude oil reserves. Our black gold was the only reason why the UMNO government could (ill-)afford all the gargantuan and nonsensical wastages through corrupted practices and failed foolish mega projects.

Our oil reserves are running low now with no new valuable commodities in sight. UMNO’s political power is under threat and UMNO is once again resorting to religious extremism and racial sentiments to remain in power and lord over Malaysia and Malaysians.

The question emerges once again - will Malaysia see another racial slaughter by UMNO? Will Malaysia survive another fifty years?

POTS’s Prophecy

At the rate and manner in which the population is growing, Malaysia will be very different from the one we know today even if no UMNO-inspired racial strife ever takes place.

The number of non-Muslim Malaysian Indians, Chinese and Kadazandusuns are dwindling rapidly, from both emigration as well a lower birth rate. At the same time, the number of Muslim immigrants from Indonesia, Philipines and Pakistan is increasing exponentially from selective and biased awarding of Malaysian citizenship.

The change in demographic will be felt most terribly in the state of Sabah, where genuine true-blue Kadazandusuns can lose their citizenship and by default their bumiputera privileges whilst rogue Filipinos may gain Malaysian citizenship and therefore rights to landownership and possession of assets. Already, the UMNO state government has accorded permanent residency to 200,000 (Muslim) Indonesians and Filipinos in a so-called massive operation. Fifty years from now, dare we imagine how Sabah might be?

At the other end of the spectrum, regardless of the pattern of population growth, the Malay-majority state of Perlis, Kedah, Kelantan, Pahang and Terengganu will hardly see any noticeable change fifty years from today. Be it under PAS or UMNO rule, secular or syariah regulation, in poverty or prosperity, the people might just remain as contended as they have been in good old Tanah Melayu. Issues like media freedom, corruption index, freedom of speech and international academic excellence just won’t gel in the hearts and minds of simple folks more concerned about religious piety and life in the hereafter.

By virtue of its proximity to a wealthy Singapore, Johor will continue to experience development and prosperity. Its income and crime index will continue to climb but yet the people of Johor might just never opt for another government apart from the Barisan Nasional.

The states of Perak, Penang and Selangor as well as the federal territory of Kuala Lumpur are most unpredictable. UMNO’s grip on power is weakest in these states and it is here where UMNO will go all out to provoke yet another racial turbulence.

Just as Malaysia is a heterogenous nation with many colors and shapes, the states within the republic will not evolve homogenously over the years.

Hitherto, we’ve only discussed the possibility of Malaysia going through another UMNO-engineered massacre.

Even if that never happens, will Malaysia still be a lovely nation with the environmental pollution, forest destruction, uncontrolled overfishing, shortsighted waste management and a Najib Tun Razak?

I don’t know.

Read more!